When Fear Freezes You
by pokemon fan 98
Summary: Killer Frost is dangerous partly because her emotions are heightened; especially her anger. It makes it hard for the team to get close to her. Then they realize fear should be heightened too. If people are scared enough, their logic fails them. Sometimes they freeze up. So the team tries to scare her, to get close enough to catch her. How? Pretending to be Zoom. 3x18 spoilers.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hi guys! This is an idea from a dream I had, and thought would be fun to write. It's just a possibility of what I think could happen to help Caitlin get control of her Killer Frost powers. Hope you like it!**

"Cross my heart and hope – to…" her eyes closed, and her awareness dimmed. She felt a spike of terror at the realization that she was dying, but after a few seconds she didn't feel anything. She couldn't even breathe.

She became aware again, and realized she needed to breathe. She had the ability to do that again, now that her powers were unrestrained. She needed desperately to breathe. She exhaled for the first time in a minute, a little puff of cold air escaping through her lips. No, she thought feebly, knowing what it meant. Now that she was breathing, her relief was slipping. So was her control, and unfortunately, much more quickly and decidedly than she'd ever lost it before. She wanted to live, but not like this. This was exactly what she'd wanted to avoid, what she'd known would happen if they took of her necklace. _She_ was coming out. That rush of joy she'd felt as her wound healed and her life came back to her was nothing compared to the fear she felt now, that fear of hurting the ones she loved, and liking it, as her thoughts twisted and warped themselves into that other identity. But she couldn't help it. After all, a part of her had to be like Frost already, didn't it? Frost was born out of Caitlin Snow.

Her eyes opened, a startlingly bright blue, and Frost sent a wave of ice out around her, knocking all the others off their feet and sending them sprawling. She stood in the white cloud, perfectly healed, and lifted her hands, an almost smile coming to her lips. It had been a little while since she'd done even that much with her powers. She couldn't think of why she had stopped, when they were so enjoyable. Her gaze went over to Julian, staring at her with fear and… was that grief? Whatever it was, it was pathetic. Cisco looked completely upset, the poor boy. He'd always been a little emotional.

She walked out of the lab.

"Caitlin!" she heard. Julian's voice. "Caitlin, you can come back from this!"

She stopped just outside the doorway. "And why would I want to do that?" And she really left, walking out of the building. She had lost time to make up for.

* * *

Cisco stood up, feeling numb. He didn't actually know what he was feeling. One minute he and Caitlin were laughing. Then she was seizing, and there was that horrible tone as her vitals stopped working. They'd tried shocking her, CPR, oxygen - nothing worked. And as the seconds dragged on, he had to step back, because he couldn't be that close to her and realize that she was… And Julian had moved to rip off her necklace. Cisco had told him she wouldn't want that, but Julian had done it anyway, and Cisco had felt hope even as he knew they were going against her wishes. She had to want to live, and if this gave her a chance it had to be right – and her vitals came on. Cisco was frozen as he realized she was alive, that her wound was closing. That she was going to be alright. And then he saw something, when she breathed, and when her eyes opened they weren't that warm brown. They were the freaky glowing blue eyes of Killer Frost. That was all he was able to register before he'd been thrown back. Now that the air had cleared and she had walked out of the lab, he stood against the wall, staring ahead blankly.

"I don't believe it." Julian said.

That brought some focus back. Cisco turned on him, unsure if he was angry or sad. "This is your fault. She didn't want this."

"She didn't want to die either!"

Cisco looked at him and saw the deep breaths he was taking, and knew he was going through the same emotional ringer. "She was just saying that for us, to be brave." Julian said. "She didn't want to die."

"She would've rather died than turn into Killer Frost again." Cisco said. It pained him, but there was no winning in this, either way. If they'd done nothing, Caitlin would be dead. Like this… "Is that even Caitlin anymore?" he asked quietly. He'd seen her lose control before. They'd pulled her back to herself. But even when she'd gone crazy before, she hadn't looked like that. When she had walked away, he'd seen that her hair was completely white. Just like Killer Frost from Earth-2.

"Of course it is!" Julian said.

HR walked over. "Barry needs to know about this." He said. "Immediately."

Cisco took his eyes off Julian and went to the terminal in the other room, wiping at his eyes as he did. He couldn't dwell on blame right now, or any emotion really. He needed to make a plan, to stop Killer Frost. He hoped as much as Julian that Caitlin was still in there somewhere, but even if she was, they had to find a way to get Frost.

"Barry." He said once he'd dialed the number. "Get here now."

* * *

Barry was at Star Lab in thirty seconds. Something about Cisco's tone had seemed off. He let Iris go and looked at Cisco, standing at the terminal, and saw HR and Julian behind him. "What happened?" he asked. "Is Caitlin alright?" he demanded.

Cisco met his eyes for barely a second before looking down. "No," he said, "she's not. Killer Frost took over."

Barry went over everything that had happened, trying to see how… He shoved Julian against the wall. "You took off the necklace, didn't you?"

"She would have died if I hadn't." Julian said, staring Barry down. "And I'd do it again."

Barry felt Iris's hand on his arm and released Julian, turning away. "We need to find her." He said, going all business. "Did she say anything?"

"Nothing important." Cisco said. "But what do we do when we find her? You didn't see her Barry; she'll try to kill you if she sees you. And I don't think it'll be like last time you offered to let her kill you."

"We'll worry about that later. I need to go look for her."

"No." HR said. "You can't go charging into this. Caitlin knows everything about you. She knows all your moves."

"He's right." Iris said. "If she really is Killer Frost now, she's more dangerous than anyone we've fought."

"You don't think I'm fast enough." Barry said to the room.

There was quiet. "That's not it -." Cisco started to say.

"Then what can I do?" Barry demanded. He ran to the opposite wall and slammed a fist against it. "What do we do?"

* * *

Killer Frost walked along the street confidently. It had been over two weeks since she'd seen anyone on Team Flash. She'd thought for sure they'd come to her, begging 'Caitlin' to get control. She knew they thought she needed to be rescued. She herself had thought that, whenever she had tried to restrain her powers. But what was there to rescue her from? This was still her body, her mind. Her powers. They couldn't see that she was still the same person, like she could; she was just cooler now, as her Earth-2 doppelgänger had said. More confident in what she wanted. And more confident in taking it.

She was done waiting for a happy ending that would never come her way, helping others and never helping herself. Barry got his happiness. Made sense to use the gift his selfishness had given her to feed her own selfishness, for once in her life.

Still, she was surprised she hadn't seen any of them yet. She'd run into Barry once, in the beginning, but he'd left before she could skewer him. Apparently she hadn't been attracting too much attention, for them to leave her alone like this.

Whatever, she thought. They could do what they liked, as long as they didn't get in her way. If they did, they wouldn't do it again. They wouldn't be able to.

It was dark out, the middle of the night, but she saw the crackle of electricity in the corner of her eye and stopped. It seemed like thinking about someone really did make them appear. "Come out, come out, Flash." She called out. She flexed her hands at her side, readying herself.

When she saw the trail again she shot icicles in its direction as it raced in front of her, but she missed. "Come on Barry." She said. "You're a coward now, hiding instead of fighting?"

"I'm not a coward."

She actually paused, her hands momentarily warming. That wasn't Barry's voice, but another speedster's. "I know that's you, Barry." She said, trying to sound completely confident. It mostly worked. "He's dead."

There was another trail of lightning, and she looked carefully at the color. It was blue. "Are you so sure?"

She started shaking, her eyes darting as she tried to find him. It couldn't be him; she had watched the Time Wraiths take him away, and Barry had said he wasn't alive. No, he was dead, this was a trick Barry was using to get to her. She refroze the air around her hands, readying herself. She wouldn't be tricked so easily. "If you want me to believe it's really you, show yourself." She called out, her voice steady again.

"As you wish."

There was a rush of air, and then a figure all in black stood in front of her, his face covered by a mask. If it was Barry, she would know. But she looked at the figure and saw those cavernous black eyes staring at her, and a chill of horror went through her. You couldn't fake those eyes. Not like this.

"Hunter." She said.

"Hello Caitlin."

* * *

"Are you sure this is gonna work?" Barry asked.

"Absolutely." Julian said. "Killer Frost is so dangerous because she runs on her emotions, and all of her emotions are heightened. Usually we only see the anger, but it should work the same for fear. And if anger sharpens her powers -."

"Fear might temporarily shut them down." Cisco finished, cutting him off. "She's still scared of him."

"And you've got the voice pattern?"

Cisco pressed a button on the terminal, and a deep voice said "Hello Caitlin."

Barry nodded. "Yeah, that's it alright. How did you do that again?"

"I'll teach you later." Cisco said. "The important thing is that it works, and it's already connected to your suit. Whenever you talk you'll sound like Zoom."

"Great." Barry said. "Where's the Velocity-9?"

Julian handed him a shot. "It won't last long."

"It won't need to." Barry said. "Just long enough to convince her it's really him."

"You'll need to hit her hard." Cisco said. "She'll be on guard."

Barry looked at him and nodded, pulling the mask over his face. "I'll bring her back." And he rushed off.

Cisco looked at the empty doorway, hopeful but incredibly guilt-ridden.

"This'll work." Julian said. "It's a great plan."

"I know." Cisco said. That didn't mean it wasn't heartless. He only knew she was still scared because he'd heard her, when she was sleeping. He'd seen how damaged she was after Zoom, heard her cry out because she thought he was back. He'd watched over her every time she'd slept in the lab, when she'd first come back from being kidnapped, and just recently, after her surgery. It had been worse right after the kidnapping, but he knew she was still terrified of Zoom. The reason she didn't show it, or maybe even realize it, was that they knew they would never see him again. It always helped when you knew a nightmare couldn't follow you into daylight. Barry had confirmed that the Hunter Zolomon they had hated was gone forever, turned into a zombie thing. Cisco knew that fear could overwhelm logic, though; that's what they were banking on. Caitlin had heard that Zoom was gone, but if Barry could be convincing enough… it might bring her mind back to being his prisoner, make her falter.

And Barry just needed an opening.

He just wasn't sure if he would feel more triumphant or wretched if it worked.

* * *

"Caitlin."

She swallowed. "Don't call me that. You can't be real."

"I've told you before," he said in that deep voice, "I am darkness."

"How are you here?" she asked, mad at herself for being afraid but unable to feel anything besides the fear. This was really him. He was back, and he'd said he would kill her the last time. She took a step back.

He ignored her question and stepped forward, so he was inches away from her. "You've become darkness too." He breathed. "Just like I said you could."

"That's right." She said desperately. "So you better leave me alone, or I'll kill you."

She tried to calm her shaking hands, seeing that the ice around them was ebbing considerably, and managed to make them solid again.

Zoom reached one hand up and touched her chin, bringing his face closer so it was almost touching hers. Those black pits studied her. "Caitlin." He breathed again. "I told you I loved you. That I didn't want to hurt you. But I'm past that now." He brought his other hand up to stroke her cheek, and her breath hitched, her pulse jumping erratically. "I came to do what I promised. Kill you."

The hand that had been on her cheek jerked back, and she closed her eyes, crying out. She felt tears cross her cheeks, warmer than her skin, and knew she was shaking badly. Her powers wouldn't do any good now. She couldn't stand up against him. She couldn't freeze her hands even if she wanted to, and he was too fast for it to matter. She was going to die.

She thought he would phase through her chest and obliterate her heart, but instead she felt his closed fist slam against her stomach, once, twice, five, seven times, knocking her back and doubling her over. She fell to the ground. And he didn't stop. He was going to drag it out, kicking and punching. It was barely thirty seconds later and she felt beaten all over, and opened her watery eyes to see him looking at her.

"No powers?" he asked.

She heard her rattling, sobbing breath and shook her head, waiting for it to be over.

The voice changed, to one she was very familiar with. "Caitlin."

She looked up again and saw not black pits, but normal human eyes. Barry's.

"Take control now." He said. "Control your powers."

Something in her registered that this was a trick, that she should strike out and get away. But the rest of her was too shocked to do that. "Barry -." Her voice sounded different, not completely in sync.

Barry leaned down next to her, pulling back his mask. "Come on Caitlin! You're doing it."

She felt her hands get cold again, and realized she was shaking for more than one reason. "I don't need help." She said. "This is what I want."

He shook his head. "If that were true you wouldn't be fighting right now."

She realized with a shock that he was right; her desire to kill him was almost gone, and while her hands still felt cold, she wasn't terrified anymore.

"You don't need to shut away your powers." He said. "I think that's why all this happened. Accept them, and control them. Don't let them control you anymore."

"I -."

"Come on!"

There was a tingling sensation in her body, distinguished from the pain of the beating she'd taken. She realized it was warmth, returning to her. Her hands were cold, but her core was warming, spreading slowly, and she looked at Barry, really looking at him.

"Barry." Caitlin cried, finally feeling clearheaded.

A smile broke out on his face, and he leaned down to hug her. "No," she said at the contact, feeling that warmth stop spreading. "Don't trust me yet!"

He sprang back and became serious, nodding. "Whatever you need, I'm here." He said.

Caitlin sat up and looked at her hands. She experimentally coated them in ice, wondering if she could keep control. For a few seconds she did, and then she felt the smallest of lapses and gritted her teeth. She had to keep the control now.

But she couldn't; not fully, not yet. And she knew Barry saw it, and was thankful when he knocked her out and gave her the relief of darkness.

* * *

Cisco looked at her through the cell door. She was still unconscious, but he wasn't leaving her down here alone. He would be here when she woke up, in case she was herself.

He kept playing over her capture in his head. He'd doubted how convincing their plan would be, but the Velocity-9 had done its job. It had temporarily given Barry blue lightning, and allowed him to make his eyes look all creepy. When Barry had revealed himself, Cisco had thought he was a goner. He'd thought Killer Frost would spring into action, angrier than ever at being tricked like that.

He hadn't known seeing her nightmare would cause that much damage. She could have killed Barry, if she'd wanted to. She'd had plenty of opportunity, after he'd revealed himself and just stood there. But she hadn't done anything.

And then he'd heard her through Barry's suit, and it had been Caitlin. Not Killer Frost, not the in-between, but Caitlin Snow. That was why he wasn't leaving her now. She'd sounded like herself, while still looking like Killer Frost. She'd used her powers, without being lost in them (at least for a little while). That meant she could beat this.

He knew she was already close to it, or Barry would have knocked her out sooner.

He heard footsteps behind him and turned to see Julian in the mouth of the room. Cisco walked past him, letting Julian take his spot right in front of the cell. There was no reason for them both to be right there. He stopped just in the hallway, turning to look in. Watching her, like he always would when she slept in the lab. Even if Julian was there too.

She was stirring, and when she opened her eyes he leaned closer, anxious to see what color they were. Brown or blue.

He was surprised when he saw that they were both. Surprised, but not for long. Then he smiled.

"Caitlin." Julian said, relief dripping from his voice.

She looked like she almost wanted to smile but couldn't bring herself to, and her eyes flicked up to him for a second. He saw in that look that, at least for the moment, she was in total control. He also saw that she was kind of broken again, and tore his gaze away at knowing that it was his fault. He knew it had been what let her get control, but he still felt ashamed. Now she had to deal with that recovery all over again.

At least Julian was there, he thought as he turned to walk away. Julian would help her when she had nightmares. He would watch out for her, make sure her powers didn't take over again.

Cisco just silently promised that he would do that too. After all, she was his best friend.

He had to make sure he didn't lose her.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hi guys! This was originally going to be a one-shot, but I couldn't resist adding just a little bit more. So here it is. I hope you like it!**

 _"_ _I told you I loved you. That I didn't want to hurt you. But I'm past that now. I came to do what I promised. Kill you."_

 _Those black eyes seemed to swallow her up as he raised his hand and made to strike her, and she screamed as the hand started to fall-_

Caitlin snapped her eyes open and stared at the ceiling, her heart pounding the only sound she could hear aside from her own gasping. It wasn't him, she told herself forcefully, but her voice shook. How could her voice shake inside her own head? It wasn't Zoom.

"Cait, are you alright?"

Her gaze slid to Julian, and she realized the scream she'd made in the dream may not have stayed there. She didn't know if she'd been screaming when she woke up. She hadn't thought she was. But he was leaning over her, his face a mask of concern and tenderness. "Fine." She said quickly, shutting him out. "Just a bad dream."

Her pulse started slowing, and she realized she was coated in sweat, rapidly cooling her. She turned away from him, breathing through her mouth and trying to act like she was alright. She most certainly was not, but that was her problem.

Every time she closed her eyes, she saw _him_. Zoom. Even though she knew it was Barry, she felt dizzyingly scared every time she thought of that encounter. He'd just been so convincing. So like Hunter.

She'd never been more scared of anyone in her life. The only thing that rivaled that was her fear of losing control of her powers, and that had happened too. At the same time.

She'd told Cisco she didn't blame him for making the plan. It had worked. But in a way it had made that dormant fear worse than before, because there was a big difference now: now, she had powers. She could have stood up for herself, but being face to face with that monster (so she thought at the time at least) … it had completely overwhelmed her. So even when she had the ability to defend herself, to protect herself, she didn't.

What did that mean for the future?

Rationally, she knew Zoom was gone. Barry promised to never put on that suit again, and the real Zoom couldn't get to her. She dared to close her eyes for just a second as she continued to breathe, trying to calm herself, and felt a hand on her arm.

"Caitlin, stop!"

She sat up and realized her hands had frozen again, and a thin layer of crystal was spreading around where they had touched the blanket. Her eyes widened and her breathing became heavier again, and she looked at Julian for help, thinking she would lose it.

"It's okay." He said, as soothingly as he could. "It's fine. Just a reaction from your dream, that's all."

Somehow his words had an effect, and she found her head nodding as she breathed out and felt her hands warm again. She didn't lose control. "Thank you."

He didn't look away. "Your nightmare." He said. "It was about Zoom, wasn't it?" It wasn't really a question.

"No," she said, "of course not. I know it was Barry." She looked away.

He demanded her gaze again by touching her chin, and she thought back to another hand touching her there, covered in black –

She recoiled, moving farther back on the bed and drawing her knees up, her hands on either side of her braced on the bed. Julian held up his hands, a look of confusion and concern on his face. "I didn't mean anything, I swear."

She took a shaky breath and shook her head. "No," she said, annoyed with herself. "you didn't do anything wrong. It just reminded me of…"

"It was about Zoom." He said.

"He grabbed my chin like that too." She said in a low voice. Then she sighed and told him. "And I know it was really Barry, and I wasn't in real danger, but I can't stop this! I can't stop thinking he's here, and I feel so stupid but I can't help it because I'm so terrified!"

She stared resolutely at the wall as tears clouded her vision (tears she would not shed, she told herself), but in her peripheral vision she saw Julian adjust his position in his chair, so that he was close to her but not touching her.

"I can't pretend to know what you're feeling." He said. His voice was extremely gentle. "I know he got close to you and then betrayed you. And being reminded of that when your emotions were so vulnerable must have been unimaginable. Any person would struggle with it. But you know closing yourself in won't help. You've got to let yourself be helped. Allen, Cisco, Iris, they're here for you. I'm here for you. Let them help." His voice lowered. "Let me help."

Slowly she drew her gaze to him, and felt the fear start to clear away. "You won't leave?" she clarified.

His eyes never left hers. "Not for a second."

She swallowed and nodded slightly, moving herself so she lay flat on the bed again. She continued to look at him with her head tilted to the side. "He's not real." She said. She was feeling kind of strange, a sort of floating-vulnerable state she associated with stress and being tired. But she needed the simple reassurance.

"No; you're safe."

She exhaled and allowed her eyes to close again. And when she saw that mask behind her eyelids a few minutes later, those black eyes staring into her, and tensed, she felt a hand cover one of her own, and the mask slipped out of view. At least temporarily. A voice floated around her, soft and loving.

"You're safe."

* * *

That was the second night after she'd gotten back. The first she had completed in the cell, in case her powers overwhelmed her again. She wasn't as scared of losing control anymore, which was nice. Of course she was still extremely wary, and if she felt at all disoriented by a nightmare she worried of slipping back into the Killer Frost persona. But for the most part, she didn't have to think about it. She could use her powers for a few seconds in complete control, and if she felt herself start to slip, she could shut it off herself.

Julian said she was growing, and the proof was in her eyes. They used to be a simple brown. When she gave in to Killer Frost, that brown shifted to varying shades of blue, until she'd completely become Frost, and the blue had become normal. She'd thought her eyes would be brown again, but when Julian had shown her her reflection, they were in-between. They were a hazel color now, a rich brown fused perfectly with a cool blue.

She liked to think he was right about her growing. She was fully in her own head again. If she could learn to use her powers while still keeping control, it would only be beneficial. But she was being cautious, possibly too much. She was staying in the lab. If she went home and started to slip again, and couldn't rein herself in, she was helpless. If she stayed in the lab and that happened, she could at least try to lock herself in a cell.

The others told her it wouldn't happen. They said she wouldn't lose control again. Caitlin had to be certain, before she put any of them in danger again.

She hadn't really expected anyone to stay with her, that second night, but Julian hadn't even asked. He'd just taken the chair next to her bed and talked with her until she fell asleep. She'd been completely grateful when she'd woken from that nightmare and found him still beside her.

When she woke up the next morning, he was sleeping in the chair in what had to be a horribly uncomfortable position, and it took her a second to realize why; he hadn't wanted to take his hand out of reach. It was on the bed, right next to hers. She smiled, truly, for the first time in days.

There was a sound of a door shutting, and Julian started awake, blinking sleepily as he looked around.

"It's Cisco." Caitlin said. She knew his habits, and that he liked to be the first one in the lab. Sure enough, she saw him walk past, giving her a quick look as she did. Ever the little brother.

Julian smiled at her. "Made it through the rest of the night." He said.

"Thanks to you."

"You didn't have any more nightmares?"

"Not like that one." She said honestly. Her sleep still hadn't been perfectly peaceful, but her dreams had been less vivid after waking up, and that always made them not quite as scary. "I'm okay, really." She told him. It wasn't a lie. Right now, she felt completely normal. It was only when nighttime came that things became distorted by fear.

Julian nodded and stood up. "Best get ready for the day." He said, somewhat awkwardly. He walked out of the room.

Caitlin smiled lightly at his retreating profile and started to rise herself, when Cisco popped his head in the doorway. "You okay?"

She smiled at him and dipped her head in confirmation. She wasn't back to normal, by any means. She expected to grapple with her powers for some time before feeling like that danger was completely past. And she knew she would wake up from a nightmare of Zoom that night, and probably the next one after that. That fear wasn't gone. But right now, at this moment, she wasn't worried about a thing.

"Let's go back to work." She said. "We've got a meta to catch."

"So you work in your PJ's now?"

Caitlin threw a pillow at him and grabbed a change of clothes. Cisco grinned, holding the pillow. "So you do like pillow fights." She went to move past him, and felt the pillow slide down her back.

She paused, thinking of how to respond, and had an evil thought. She made her hands freeze. "Are you sure you want to get into this?"

She looked around and saw him looking with concern at her hands, and laughed as she dropped the power, walking over to him. "Don't worry so much." She said with a kind smile.

He kind of glared at her, but she knew it was forced. She playfully shoved at his arm and the look faded, until he was grinning again. That done, she walked out of the room to change.

"This isn't over!" he called after her.

She smiled.


End file.
